Nottingham invaded again


I went to the Nottingham Invasion in January (see below) which turned out to be very good night out. So much so that I felt it was worth repeating. Unfortunately, because of unexpected work stuff which delayed me, I left London late and got stung for higher train fares, which was very annoying (and painful in the purse). However, I was pleased to be able to help out all sorts of visitors to London with directions and help in using ticket machines. Although that caused me to miss one train I was actually chuffed that nobody seemed to be put off asking a TGirl for help – I guess I’m more confident these days and try to look my best. Being addressed as “Madam”, “Miss”, “Darling”, “this lady” makes me happy.

I stayed at the New Gables hotel again, which is very good value, comfortable and friendly, and was where my friends were staying. I didn’t get there till 6.15 but at least all I had to do was change from my well-worn leggings into my new dress, lace tights and 5½ inch stilettos (killer heels had been agreed on beforehand). I hardly ever wear a dress – I’m more of a co-ordinates girl – whereas most of my friends come to these events in pretty ones so it was time to blend in! Besides, it was Emma Jewkes’s birthday the day before so party frocks seemed appropriate.

Met up with Tiff, Mrs Tiff, Emma and Maddy all in their lovely posh frocks, Gayna in a smart blouse and skirt, and Joanne who had her fabulously best goth outfit yet, and we took a taxi to the New Foresters pub. Nice to catch up, albeit briefly, with Samantha and her partner Vicky, and with Sophie whom I hadn’t seen since Sparkle, as well as Tanya T and Marcia whom I’d met last time. I was glad to meet Lynn Jones for the first time as her comments on Facebook always crack me up and was introduced to Rachel Katie Sparkle. Spoke briefly to other girls, Emma, Jenny, well-endowed Alexia, but it’s had to remember all names.

Me with beautiful birthday girl Emma Jewkes, and lovely friend Tiff.


Now you can’t hang around a pub all evening (can you?) so the Invasion was duly marched off to Oceana which does an entry deal for us girls. Truthfully, I don’t quite know what to make of this place. The gloopy carpet, the smell of decay, the malcoordinated noise and the violent dancefloor lighting strike me as being the ideal location for students of modern history to spend an evening: not only do they have fun with their mates but they get an appreciation of a night assault at Ypres with its slimy horrors underfoot, the stench of death, the deafening noise and the contorted bodies jerking in the flashes, like a whole battalion of fancy dress fusiliers caught on barbed wire. The girl going round offering you a shot doesn’t exactly contradict the image. Still, on the plus side, the ladies loos are nice as club loos go (but please put the seat down, girls), we get in cheap, we’re accepted by the staff (and at least some of the punters there) and you can have a bit of a giggle, especially as there’s a rivalry between the local hard men and the TGirls as to who can score highest on the punching machine. I suspect the hard men feel threatened by the TGirls – but let’s show that we’re ready to dish it out if necessary! An hour or so of Oceana is OK.

On to NG1 which has a pleasant bar area with competent staff, a wide range of drinks and comfortable seating where the music is merely background and you can hold a conversation. We were latched onto by a total whackpot who threw himself onto us “divas” in such an unselfconscious manner that I cannot help but record his presence. He tried out our shoes, preened and strutted (because that’s what we do, apparently), asked Mrs Tiff if she was a transvestite, declared his boyfriend had just walked out on him (we were surprised) but despite being insanely inconsolable he managed to fiddle with someone else in the gents before the evening was out. He said he was a mental health nurse. Evidently one who likes to take his work home with him. What a pest!

Fewer good photos from this event, sadly, but this is one of the odder ones. Gayna, Tiff, me, Maddy, Emma at NG1 bar. Photo taken by Joanne who wanted an interesting angle. Now, I've heard many excuses for being drunk ...


Now, sensible girls take coats and flats with them so they don’t have to stagger up and down the freezing streets in nothing but their frocks and stilettos. And they get a lot of stick for it from diehard trannies. But they have the last laugh as their friends stagger back to the pub with painful feet and goose pimples. Ha ha ha!

We fell in to the New Foresters again for chips, which are good and cheap there, and were entertained by the antics of a couple of drunk and menacing admirers. Quite a night for weirdo watching! And people say TGirls are strange! I'm also told the girls behind the bar dress just in knickers and fascinators because that's their outfit for the cabaret turn at the pub. Sure, but a missing skirt puts me off ordering a burger bun!

Anyway, it was good to catch up with friends. Sadly, I thought it best to leave the next day rather than trying to make a weekend of it. I missed breakfast as it takes me ages to put my face on, but that just goes with the territory. Despite the excesses I managed to fit into my skinny jeans for the journey home. (Actually, it being Nottingham and St Patrick’s Day I should’ve worn green tights to blend in!) Here’s a mystery, though. I took a case and a bag to Nottingham, but came back with everything fitting in just the case. Weird! But hey, weird is what we like. 

Thanks to fabulous Sam and lovely Maddy for organising, Maria and Debbie for being welcoming, inspiring Emma for being sweet and still young, Tiff, Mrs Tiff, Gayna and Joanne for being brilliant friends and all the other girls who make it a good evening, and to staff at the New Gables, New Foresters, Oceana and NG1 for being welcoming. 

Sue x